Strange #1

Writer: Mark Waid
Artist: Emma Rios

So for the first time in over a year, I willingly paid for a single from Marvel Comics. Only two reasons why I did this

1.) Waid (Flash) was writing it
2.) It was a Doctor Strange comic.

So, was this worth the close to 3.99 I paid for it? Almost.

The story starts out with a slight olde school insert from the old Doctor Strange comics whilest at the same time foreshadowing an event that looks to happen much later in the story (Stephen Strange looking as though he's being torturted) CUT TO ...a baseball game.

An angsty teen is twittering via her phone about having to sit thru said game, a fly ball she catches and throws back squarely into none other then Stephen Strange. The coincidence is of course not one as Stephen tries to get the girl to lead him to her Grandfather (the manager of the home team playing). Apparently the team is involved in some kind of deal with a demon and in losing the game all the souls in the arena essentially will get sucked into hell. Stephen is confronted by the dealer demon and you soon realize that Strange has become known as somewhat of a hack now, even in Demonic circles. There is more but, I don't wanna give the whole issue away.

The first issue of Strange is good but not great. Waid's storytelling an characterization is on point, the callback to the old Strange comic, the depiction of Stephen Strange as kinda a down and out master sorcerer, etc, etc, all of it is good...which leaves the artwork. Much of the artwork Rios does in this first issue is good and has a Spider-Man Loves Mary Jane / Miyazawa feel to it, until you get to the baseball game. Essentially at one part in the story Stephen Strange has to play in a baseball game with demons. In what should be some purely awesome panels of Strange rounding the bases I was left utterly confused about what the fuck was going on. Rios's depiction of the demon players was just too much or rather too busy as you had tentacles an the like flying every which way confusing me and likely every other reader on what actually was happening. I get it, their demons, they have tentacles and other weird appendages, you don't need to show ALL of them. You eventually figure out Strange is safe on home base only when the umpire says SAFE...and yeah...that's just not good. I am not trying to bash Rios here, she's a good artist, but those panels woulda benefited from a less is more strategy

Aside from the "too many tentacles" issue this first issue of Strange was interesting. I say wait for the trade to come out though and enjoy it then. With their being only 4 issues in this series and each costing 3.99 you might save more money reading this title that way.

B+

JSA All-Stars #1 Review

Writer: Mathew Sturges
Art: Freddie Williams II
Colors: Richard & Tanya Horie

Following the events of Justice Society of America 33 and 34 comes the new spin-off title that majorly focuses on the new team players and Power Girl and Hourman. With the suggestion by Magog and Power Girl the team with 20+ characters needed to form a military squad. This is it!

The first issue sets the new status quo for the characters. Magog tries to use his military background to become field commander and sets up three sub teams. Meanwhile Power Girl is still the chairman of this new Society. While they manage to hold their ground against a group of androids, the characters are trying to figure out which sub-team they are supposed to be on. After a brief meeting of trying to come up with names and some extreme training drills the team holds a press conference. It is during this press conference that the team is attacked by the Strike Force! It is during this attack that Star Girl gets kidnapped by Johnny Sorrow. Who happens to be one of my favorite JSA villains of all time.

Freddie Williams II provides the art here for this issue and he seems to have tweaked his art style a bit. There are plenty of more shading and more detail in each picture. To be completely honest Freddie really packs each panel with immense detail, beautiful backgrounds, and when given the chance; Power Girl's tits. Even when she gets her clothes torn twice in the issue we are still being teased by her. But not every detail is a good one because it seems he also fills everyone up with a strange sort of squiggle and swirl in both their outlines as well as the texture on their clothes. At times the sizes of the characters change. Particularly Wildcat's head and Damage's body. All the guys seem to toned-up as well; kinda reminds me of an older Bart Sears style.

Sturges establishes which characters he's taken with him to the new title. You get to know most of their personalities, their reason for being on the team, and how much growing they have to do to become one badass team on the battlefield. There was a nice mention of the Science Ninja Team Gatchaman that made me chuckle too. This was quite a bit to in one issue so he got the job done of establishing his new status quo. He really is proving himself to be a good writer. I'm glad they chose someone who’s got a very strong feel for these characters and their respective personalities. They all feel very much like they have in the past, when Johns or Goyer were writing them.

It's not a bad start for a new book and it does the job of setting up why this team has to exist outside of the main JSA book. The inclusion of two old villains showing up was a nice notch to the older readers and I'd like to see Magog develop into a character outside of his cookie cutter mold which was Cable (back in the New Mutants days).
B

Nation X #1 Review

Writers: Chris Yost, Simon Spurrier, James Asmus, & Scott Snyder
Artists: Mike Allred, David Lopez, Michele Bertilorenzi, & Leonard Kirk

I'm not really why Marvel insisted on canceling X-men Unlimited if they were going to keep comics like this, Divided We Fall, and Manifest Destiny around. But maybe these miniseries work better like TV seasons instead of monthly anthologies.

It is nice to see some of the characters that haven't been the spotlight of Uncanny or Legacy take light. It's also good to see the remaining cast of Young and New X-men come back and kick us off. So the idea behind this series is to show us how some of the other mutants who aren't Wolverine or Cyclops, or shit even Deadpool nowadays are dealing with this new Utopia that Cyclops has created for mutant kind. Unfortunately nothing really stands out in these four stories. Not to say that it's a terrible series, but nothing really shines like those Brandon Peterson covers, sorry horrible analogy I couldn't resist.

The Ghost of Asteroid M turns out to be the weakest part of the book. While then art is fine and get the job done; the story is bland and the dialogue is almost out of character for Magneto. Turns out the ghost was nothing more than a message by Magneto himself. Road Trip was probably the highlight for me because of Allred's art. It fit the story even if it was just a silly college humor kind of story. Cold Shoulder seem to go on a little too long to get the point across that Iceman does care, but he has to joke about everything to cover how scared he is. It was nice to see Stinger back, nice throwback to those classic X-factor stories. Testament was a solid story about Colossus not being able to leave the past behind and his resurrected sister treating him like a bitch. It was a touching tale and made me miss Kitty Pride even more.

Charging four bucks for stories like these is a little too much. If they had made it 64 pages instead of a four issue limited series it would have worked better. While it's not terrible it can be easily skipped and unless the next few issues bring something new to the table, the whole series can probably be skipped. C

Dark Wolverine #81 Review

Writers: Daniel Way & Marjorie Liu
Pencils: Giuseppe Camuncoli
Inks: Onfrio Catcchio
Colors: Marte Gracia
Cover: Brandon Peterson

I had to mention the cover artist because it's really weird to see Dark characters shine. While this works for the cosmic events like War of the Kings, I thought this title was supposed to be dark? Put Jae Lee or Bill Sienkiewicz on the job. I get the reasoning why they did it. It's a pretty cover that is supposed to show the false relationship between Daken and Moonstone, but Dark Wolverine should never be shiny.

Enough bitching about the cover, let's start bitching about the book. It's been a long time since I've reviewed a Daniel Way Wolverine book. I think I was burned out on repeating how much his stories suck ass and how he is destroying the character of Wolverine. Dark Wolverine or Daken is another matter though. He happens to be his own creation and for some reason Marvel is trying to make him a heavy hitter in their universe. As far as I'm concerned, I really could give a fuck about Daken and his mighty misadventures and this issue does nothing to intrigue the character.

Moonstone goes and looks for Daken and after flying around for half an issue she finds him and has some tea with him. Through a series of flashbacks we learn why Daken likes tea or doesn't like tea so much. We learn that he killed an old woman and he is a liar! What the fuck am I reading?!! I get that Dr.Karla Sofen is trying to psychoanalyze this douchebag that she has an interest in, but the execution is horrible. They spend half the issue answering questions with questions? Am I supposed to care about Daken, because shitty stories like this really make me despise the character even more? This issue is seemingly built solely to portray Daken as a misanthropic rogue a loose fucking cannon of the Dark Avengers. This is a fact that has already been shoved down our throats in other books; Making this series an instantly forgettable and unnecessary character study. You want an example of a good psychoanalysis issue; go read X-factor 87. Thais es a complete baste of time.

While I dig Camuncoli's characters, this book really needs a background artist. His style is a unique twist on the classic mangaesque look, but his buildings and setting really need some work. Perhaps a different inker and colorist to darken the feel of the book would help. To be honest I think they should replace the whole creative team or just cancel this useless book. I'm hoping someone will resurrect Sabretooth to come and chop this fucking hack of a Wolverine's head off. D

Ultimatum #4 Choose-Your-Own Verdict

So I thought I might write a review for this comic since y'know, that's sort of what we're supposed to do here, but instead I thought I would just tell you my case (it isn't good) and then, as if this were some sort of court case, give you evidence supporting it.

Verdict: Ultimatum is shock-gore horse-$#!% intended to make you THINK it's good because they're doing "CRAZY" things, when really, it's just superbly bad writing with people dying to make it look important.

EXHIBIT A:

Apparently, Ultimate Spider-Man is dead. Way to go, assholes. The only reason 90% of the readers pick up Ultimate titles is now Jeph Loeb-fodder.

EXHIBIT B:

BUNGHOLES?! Damn you, Loeb. Nick fury DOES NOT EQUAL Beavis and Butthead. It's the Ultimates, you wrote Ultimates 3 so "Edgy", why can't he just say assholes, or jerks, or ANYTHING BUT BUNGHOLES!?!?!?!?

EXHIBIT C:

Explaining why this is bad would be like showing you the a video of the victim (Comic Books) being stabbed by the defendant (Jeph Loeb) and then having to actually explain why that is bad.

EXHIBIT D:

He can't even write his own Evil Villain Dialogue. He has to borrow it from the Bible. Lazy and super F'd out.

EXHIBIT E:

Gore for the sake of gore. OMG THEY KILLED TEH DOKTOR STRANJJ!!!1

EXHIBIT F:

More gore for the sake of gore. So retarded. So so retarded. No fights, no characterization, it's like a kid playing with action figures. All that's needed is just the characters hitting each other and everyone's having the time of their life. This is so $#!%.

So there you go faithful readers. Make up your own minds. Is this not awful? Also, I love Finch as an artist, and this is some of the worst work I have ever seen him churn out.

Exiles # 1 Review

Writer: Jeff Parker
Artist: Salva Espin
Colors: Anthony Washington
Publisher: Marvel

I'm guessing that this is the fourth volume Exiles..if I don't include the original Malibu Comics run, just the one where Juggernaut, Reaper, and Siena Blaze were on....maybe I shouldn't count that one either. Anyway, this is a fresh start to a very very familiar story.

For some unknown reason Morph (assuming it's the same Morph from the original series) is now the Timebroker and has gathered six new Exiles to go on missions hopping from world to world. They are to fix what isn't supposed to be broken in these different Earths. I'm sure if you've read Exiles before this all sounds like the same idea. Well, it really is. Morph gives Blink, who doesn't act like the Age of Apocalypse Blink the Tallus that states what their missions are and they go off to find a world where Magneto rules and Wolverine drools...errr is dead.

The five new characters are Panther, Forge, Beast, the Witch, and Polaris. They all seem really bland and boring. Forge did die a pretty heroic death in his world though, so I have hopes for him. I think the problem I had with Parker's writing is that they all sounded the same. They read more like teenagers and I hate to say it, but they sound like they belong in the Marvel Adventures book series. I figure with a revamp that Parker would take this opportunity to introduce some new elements to the series and give us a fresh start. But, it's all the same just with new faces and different goals.

I can't say I loved the art either. Espin has a simple style that you can tell he is still perfecting. Characters vary in look and size from panel to panel and he adds very little to keep me interested in the already bland story. The cover by Bullock reminds me of Mark Pacella from the 90s and that isn't a good thing. The variant cover shown here really makes no sense. Since the only appearance Wolverine makes in the book is as a decapitated corpse. Way to boost those sells. I'll keep reading in hopes the stories and characters grow on me, but this is really a bad start since I had high expectations after reading Agents of Atlas. D

Wolverine: Weapon X # 1 Review

Writer: Jason Aaron
Artist: Ron Garney
Covers: Ron Garney, Olivier Copiel, Alan Davis, and Adam Kubert
Colors: Jason Keith
Publisher: Marvel Comics

It's been a long time since I've done comic reviews other than the manga with Melanie and Tommy. I guess I got really burned out on saying the same crap about Daniel Way fucking up Wolverine or Geoff Johns treating each character with love. So I figure let's go back to the drawing board and pump out some reviews again. After all it is partly the reason why Dan and I started the site. We just got tired of reading kiss ass review after kiss ass review. Why not start with a new ongoing series starring my favorite character: Wolverine?

Weapon X is a new ongoing series (hellz yeah! Wolverines needs more than 7 books a month!) by Jason Aaron and Ron Garney. The first issues introduces the idea of more people like Wolverine running around as killing machines. The twist this time is that it isn't the Weapon X program turning people into assassins, but Blackguard. All this information comes from ex-mutant and ex-badass Maverick. Now Wolverine, with a brand new costume has to search for these assassins.

Not much of a start, just a simple story that could have been told in Wolverine or better yet Wolverine Origins, since Weapon X is such a big part of Logan's past. But I'm not Marvel and I'm sure they have good smart people making the calls when the new Wolverine movie is about to come out. I see nothing new in this first issue; new Wolverine villains with claws! Apparently Blackguard thinks it’s a good idea to enhance the claws by making them glow in the dark. That would surely make it easier to sneak up on your target. What I did like about the issue is that it read like the classic stories of Chris Claremont or early Larry Hama. A self contained story centered around Wolverine without going too deep into his past or catching readers up with his current convoluted status.

I do like the way Aaron writes Wolverine, although I doubt Logan would chop a mugger's hand off; everything else sounded like the bub using Wolverine we all love. What I don't get is the Spanish line: "Me Cago en Diez" Which literally translates to "I shit on ten!" Not sure if the guy is counting down to his crap time or if he is shitting on Grant Morrison's Attack on Weapon Plus story, cause I'm with you on that one Spanish cannon fodder! The art by Garney reminds me of the late John Buscema. It's very sketchy but man he can really set the atmosphere of the threat that Wolverine will be facing. Stop buying Wolverine Origins and don't even think about pre-ordering that Dark Wolverine story; As far as good Wolverine stories are concern this is probably the only place you are going to find one. B

Ultimatum #1 Review

Writer: Jeph Loeb
Artist: David Finch
Inks: Danny Miki
Covers: Finch and Ed McGuinness

With a Secret Invasion encompassing the entire Marvel Universe, the Ultimate Marvel Universe has been pushed to the side. For about a year now there have been hints as to a huge Ultimate Marvel Universe event looming on the horizon with the mysterious “March on Ultimatum” banner hovering above many Ultimate titles. With the recently concluded Ultimate Origins mini-series and the Ultimates vol. 3 having wrapped up, readers now know that Magneto is pissed. Both of his children (Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch) have died and the master of magnetism has vowed to make everyone pay. Thus, the Ultimatum has begun.

The first issue is a pretty fast read. We open up on a regular afternoon. Reed Richards is about to propose to Sue Storm, Peter Parker and friends ride a train through Manhattan, the Ultimates team drink, argue and bicker and some of the Ultimate X-Men prepare to watch a play. Suddenly, the sky grows dark and a tidal wave floods the city. Within a few pages many characters die. Those who have perished thus far: Dr. Storm, Beast, Dazzler, Nightcrawler and tons of innocent people. The Human Torch is missing amidst the chaos and Iron Man rescues Captain America from drowning. Reed Richards and Sue Storm race to the top of the Baxter Building where Sue uses her powers to repel the tidal wave back into the ocean, yet due to the extreme stress and overload of her powers she goes into some sort of power coma. Ben Grimm races to the roof wondering what’s going on and Reed races off to the ocean determined to pin the blame on Namor. Elsewhere, Kitty Pryde phases Peter Parker to the top of a nearby building and tells him to don his tights and go save lives. Peter is worried about his friends but Kitty vows to protect them against any threats that may occur. Basically, all the ultimate heroes are caught completely off guard.

In Latveria, Dr. Doom is shocked to find his castle and his country suffering from an arctic deep freeze. Reed Richards jets over the ocean surface and confronts Namor, hoping to blame the sea criminal with the recent disaster in New York. Namor scoffs at this accusation and informs Reed that he would never commit any action that would endanger Sue. At Xaiver’s mansion, Wolverine and Cyclops rush to Professor Xaiver’s study. Xaiver informs them that many of his students have died and he knows who to blame for this disaster. Using his psychic powers, Xaiver contacts Captain America, Iron Man, Spider-Man, Reed Richards and others telling them they must join forces and face the monster responsible for this attack: Magneto. The issue ends with Magneto sitting on his throne, wanting all the heroes to come and suffer at his hands.

Thoughts/Comments:
For such a hyped up Marvel event, this issue read very fast. Yes, a lot happened in the first few pages. But with all the splash pages (despite being beautifully illustrated by Mr. Finch) the issue felt like a fast paced movie trailer. Also, there was a spoiler regarding the current Ultimate Spider-Man story arc before it’s conclusion (Gwen’s back in the cast) and how exactly has Magneto gained the ability to control the weather to such extents as seen in this issue? Still, the artwork was gorgeous and I really enjoyed the end with Professor Xaiver telling all the heroes to go out and kick Magneto’s ass! I don’t really understand why Marvel is charging $3.99 an issue for this event but it should make for a awesome trade when the story wraps up. Also, despite having a year head start the second issue has already been delayed until next month. That’s not a great way to start an epic mini-series event and it might give a lot of customers a bad taste in following the single issues of this story-line. Overall, I’d give the story a C; the art gets A and the combined score a **B-. **Here’s hoping the next issue amps up the action as the heroes confront Magneto head on.

Iron Man: The End

IRON MAN: THE END
Writer(s): David Michelinie & Bob Layton
Pencils/Art: Bernard Chang

No you didn't drink some funky kool-aid I am in fact reviewing an Iron Man comic before Dan could.

Iron Man : The End is essentially solicited as a sort of Dark Knight Returns only with...well Iron Man. Yeah....this comic isn't so much DKR....but more Spider-Man Reign...and that's being generous.

The plot of Iron Man: The End, begins with Tony Stark in his mid-50s/early 60s. Tony is a wreck, and I'm not talking "rough-bender/hangover" type of wreck either. Years and years having flown in the Iron Man suit and taken a beating within it has slowly destroyed Starks' body. Like an old boxer Stark yearns for his early years, his vitality, struggling to keep hold till his last great project, a space elevator, is finished and launched. While out in the Iron Man suit surveying things for the space elevator, underwater teams run aground some sabotage. Stark saves everyone but only narrowly as his suit has a rupture underwater causing a malfunction within the iron shell. Tony, after some investigating, finds a rival company was involved in the underwater sabotage, following explosive charges all the way to a warehouse front of sorts in Russia. The moment Tony touches down the Crimson Dynamo starts to kicks Tony's ass backwards and forwards. Eventually defeating Iron Man the Crimson Dynamo leaves Tony, suit melted around him, alone in the Russian Wilderness to die. Somehow, someway, Tony eventually makes it back to the states and finally realizes someone younger and smarter will have to take on the mantel of Iron Man for him. The story goes on further from this but the rest of the story is only mildly interesting.

I am a big fan of "future" stories, Days of Future Past, DKR, heck even Spider-Man Reign a little, all had these dark edgy stories that you could get into. In your traditional "future" story the world has gone to hell in a handbasket and the heroes look to come up from the ashes and save everyone and everything. Iron Man the End....it's a lame "passing of the torch" story. The world of Marvel isn't crappy, everything is so/so, there is no evil mastermind behind everything, it's just a fucking corporation hiring the Crimson Dynamo to stop a space platform from launching (and somehow solving a huge energy crisis cheaply). If I wanted to read some throwaway story like that I'd pick up a 1990s issue of Iron Man. Iron Man : The End fails where it could have been a really interesting read. The "passing of the torch" story that exists within this one-shot is more one of convenience. Essentially this issue summed up is Tony Stark realizes he's "too old for this shit" and chooses some random scientist to be the next Iron Man. There, I saved you five minutes.

The art is manageable on this title though nothing to really call home about.

I know it may seem like I am being overally harsh on this title but, yeah, it sucked. Reading this one-shot I felt nothing, I mean heck Spider-Man Reign at least got a little emotion out of me.

In closing, if you wanna see a story about Stark being a f'ing wuss, this is your book, otherwise, skip this sucker and read something you might enjoy coughs*Incredible Hercules*coughs

D-

X-men: Worlds Apart # 1 Review

Story:Christopher Yost
Penciler: Diogenes Neves
Inker: Ed Tadeo
Colors: Raul Trevino

Storm has always been one of my favorite characters in comics. She has always stood out from the rest of the heroines in the comic’s genre. Damn, even as a kid I knew a black woman leading a team of heroes was unprecedented. She has been a Goddess, X-man, leader, thief, and more recently a queen. Unfortunately, her new status as queen has really dimmed the light in this once well established character. This miniseries, if anything, accomplishes the task of proving that Storm really needs to go back home to the X-men.

I almost got excited when I saw Storm in the Morlock tunnels...err sewers with Cyclops. It seems that Cyclops needs her leadership of the Morlocks to try and recruit new mutants for his safe haven in San Francisco. He questions where her mind is and this takes us back to her recent place of residence Wakanda. It seems that Nezhno murdered an advisor to the king in cold blood. Storm thinks that something isn't right and as she releases her old ward, the King of Wakanda (Black Panther) puts a stop to her. It seems that he is being controlled by the X-men's old nemesis the Shadow King and is trying to turn her nation against her.

I guess in a way I am glad they brought the Shadow King back and if he isn't trying to take down Professor X, I guess Storm is a nice runner up. I'm not sure how I feel about Cyclops acting like a selfish brat, because Storm is now a married woman. Hell, she's only in one other book. He really just needs to sit down with Wolverine and ask him where his priorities are. I never agreed either with the ridiculous marriage of Storm and Black Panther, but I'm not Marvel. I was almost hoping that Black Panther was going to be a Skrull, but no such luck the marriage is still there. Now, this is one marriage I wouldn't mind Mephisto going after. The art gets the job, but that's about it. Some panels Storm looks determined, proud, and beautiful and others she looks like a drag queen strung out on coke. Neves' art is still better than Campbell's sketch....I mean cover. Not sure why this couldn't be told in the Black Panther book and not a $3.99 miniseries. B-